Wednesday, December 6, 2017

Vermin Supreme: America's TRUE President and ONLY Hope

Original Photograph by Chris Saunders (Instagram)

Vermin Supreme is the true president of the United States of America, but due to a glitch in the space-time continuum we somehow ended up with President Donald Trump instead. This probably has something to do with the reptilian overlords that rule over our galaxy having a bit of fun with our inferior human politics. President Supreme has assured us in the past that his crack team of scientists are currently working on fixing this glitch. The sooner the better in my opinion. 


Running on a platform that included state mandated free ponies that would replace our Social Security and State Identification cards, Vermin Supreme decreed that we would have to have these ponies with us at all time as part of his rule of our country. It would be a zombie powered America where the resurrected dead would be able to provide for us all the power we needed to survive, and also clean teeth would forced upon all citizens. Those with dirty and disgusting teeth would be sentenced to toil away in the mines or even death. Finally, a fair and free America. 


Recently, former presidential candidate and human meat puppet for the Illuminati, cyborg-lizard-person Hillary Clinton was having a signing for her critically read memoir "HOW I MESSED UP AND HOW I CHOSE TO HIDE THE FACT THAT I MESSED UP" in Concord, NH. President Supreme and his staff decided to protest this event and to promote his book "I, Pony: Blueprint for a New America". 

Because Hillary "I Swear I'm a Hu-Man Beep Boop" Clinton directly slammed President Supreme's Free Pony policy, he sued for the right to bring two beautiful ponies to the Clinton signing event, AND WON. Our American system isn't always perfect, but for this one instance I can honestly say and believe in my heart that justice has been done. As you can see from the video below, the protest was a thundering success and President Vermin Supreme was able to talk with his constituents in a manner that best represented his overall rule and dictatorship of our free and beautiful country. 



I'm not sure when the space-time glitch will be fixed, but I'm sure only the advanced minds are at work trying to correct this error. We can only hope it's fixed sooner than later. For the sake of our nation and the world, we need Vermin Supreme at the helm to guide us in the right direction. 

God bless America and God Bless Vermin Supreme. 

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