This past week I've been under the cloud of negative emotion. Towards myself and humanity as a whole. While I admit I've been misanthropic in the past, I've tried my best to steer away from that so that I could live more harmoniously with my inner and outer self. It's difficult though, especially with the weight of time on my shoulders, slowing me down as I trudge along.
I feel as though all my worries are truly invisible and non-existent. They're just made-up demons in my mind pestering me and creating self-doubt. But to a degree, I suppose, my concerns are real, but then, I wonder if it is possible to live a 100% carefree life. Everyone suffers, rich or poor, sick or healthy, so I guess what I'm going through is natural. If it's natural then why do I worry? If my aim for this year is to create a new reality tunnel by hacking into this thing I call my reality, I have to find a way for it all to either make complete sense to me, or, to make everything so abstract I don't have to worry about right or wrong answers.
My true goal is to be 100% self-sufficient. To be at a point where I don't have to ask for help from anyone, where, my finances will all be in order and I can walk into practically any restaurant and not have to worry about the price, and I can save money with confidence that I won't have to continuously loan myself anything for any sort of emergency. It's a tall order right now, but I'm sure that if I manipulate the spacetime continuum enough, that world can be mine. I just have to plan accordingly.
What sort of device must I construct within my pineal gland to change the structure of the universe I wonder.