Tuesday, February 6, 2018

What the hell is consciousness without thought


Every so often a creeping voice comes into my mind and tells me things I would rather not have to listen to. I do my best to ignore that voice, but I'm not always successful. When this happens my anxiety really tenses me up, and I become more and more isolated within my thoughts. Thinking too much is a terrible, terrible habit, and if I had the choice I'd say I'd rather not think at all. If it were somehow possible to not think and still exist as myself, I think that'd be an amazing option, but sadly not possible within the confines of this dimension. 

The true dynamic self I think wouldn't resemble anything we could recognize. The really real true self of any individual is probably a weird looking inhuman thing, creeping through the nebula. Beautiful and monstrous like some sort of cosmic slug, making its way through the void, unaware of its own existence at all. I'm kind of jealous of it to be honest. 

I wonder if pure consciousness thinks at all. Like, would it have to think to exist. Descartes is kind of a brilliant shit-for-brains if you ask me, but I wonder if I had him painted all wrong. Maybe while we exist in our current static form, we *have* to think to exist, but when we exist in our dynamic form we simply just exist.

I really am curious if for even a moment we can experience just existence without having to go through the mechanical process of thought.  

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